Being an artist can be a very isolating. I spend a lot of time alone in my studio, especially now, as I prepare for my November exhibit. I’m down to crunch time and all I’m thinking about is getting things done. I feel like I’m running out of time. I need to be in the studio more. And I wonder, how will I accomplish all of this? I take comfort that it’s all going to be OK. So I breathe. I know I’m not alone, many artists face the same angst. It’s par for the course.
As an emerging artist, there’s also this underlying insecurity. What will people think? I think my work looks OK, but I’m very biased. It’s like saying your baby is the cutest. And “everybody” thinks their baby is the cutest.
I’ve realized, I’m in a different place right now. My ideas are coming from deep in my soul. It’s a life-long journey coming together and expressing itself in fabric. My art has purpose to me…I’m no longer making it just because. I have stories behind each piece. I’m moving forward. The isolation is there and the angst, but I do my best to ignore it. I’m not going to let the negative speak defeat me.
A few months ago, I made a decision to let go of something that I was deeply invested in. As I walked away from that activity, I was reminded of a call-for-entry deadline that was fast approaching. A friend of mine frequently reminds me that we never get accepted if we don’t apply. So, I pulled my stuff together and, with a kiss on the cheek, I sent in the application. Of course, I hoped for the best, but would be OK with any decision they made.
Today, I received a phone call from out of the blue. An affirmation. They are impressed with my work. I’ve been offered a solo show in a public art gallery. I had a choice of 2 dates, so I picked one. I’m going big, so I’ll need the time. September 2018. As one door closes, another opens.
Having an affirmation like this is a kick in the pants that says don’t give up. Keep trying. There’s no room for self-doubt.